The Autogyne Files Part II
A Conversation with Anne Ominous, a young transitioner
Welcome to the second part of the series; The Autogyne Files. In this piece, I’ll be having a conversation with a young transitioner, Anne Onymous.
If you haven’t, please check out Part I, which provides an overview of what this series aims to do and may give more context to the following conversation. I hope you find this informative and helpful, please let me know in the comments.
The Autogyne Files Part I - Dirty Words: Exploring the narratives around Autogynephilia
The Autogyne Files Part II - A conversation with Anne Ominous, a young transitioner
The Autogyne Files Part III - A conversation with Jennifer, a Trans Widow
The Autogyne Files Part IV - A conversation with a young Sexologist, G
The Autogyne Files Part II
A Conversation with Anne Onymous
Quite recently, I was invited to a discord group that was occupied by young transitioners, mostly in their early to mid twenties. Normally, I wouldn’t last five minutes in a group like this, being a public detransitioner and one who has spoken very negatively of both the typologies and trans activism. Yet what I found there was something I didn’t expect, understanding and humanity, and for that, I want to return the favour in this mini series.
One of the individuals in the group was Anne Onymous, who has recently opened a substack to provide insight to what occurs within a young transitioners mind. It’s worth a read, especially if you’re looking to understand the upcoming generations and how this narrative continues to impact them.
Despite the generational gap between us, Anne’s account is highly relatable. A nerdy boy, with undiagnosed aspergers living in a rural town, raised by his mother.
Ritchie: “Hi Anne, thank you so much for speaking with me. You’re 21 now right?”
Anne: “I’m 21, yes.”
Ritchie: “And you transitioned just before lockdown? Do you think the two are connected?”
Anne: “Yes, yes a lot do seem to transition then, rumination and internal obsession heightens when we’re left to fester in our thoughts.”
Ritchie: “How did these feelings manifest?”
Anne: “I first cross dressed when I was 8 and felt as though I wanted to be a girl when I was around 12-13. I hated the changes of puberty and wished my body was female.”
Ritchie: “I was quite struck from reading a recent substack of yours; ‘Not Like Other Boys’. I found that we have similarities, as well as some key differences. What’s quite clear in your writing though, is your self-awareness. Unlike some others in your age group, you’re not in denial and are quite open to what many others are not, and I’m wondering why you think that is?”
Anne: “I seem to have an extreme degree of commitment to the truth, and a lot of self-reflection.”
Ritchie: “Why do you think that is?”
Anne: “I have an inability to suspend disbelief, and cannot believe anything without evidence. That is connected to autism based on studies I've seen.”
Ritchie: “Have any authors or researchers influenced your position today? If so, who?”
Anne: “Ray Blanchard, Mike Bailey, Anne Lawrence and Alice Dreger.”
Ritchie: “Do any of them stand out to you more than the others, and if so, why?”
Anne: “Anne Lawrence definitely spoke to me the most, and gave the best explanation for my experiences.”
Ritchie: “In your substack piece, you said you found a radical feminist space, and conversations in that space led to you feeling guilty for your desires. You said this caused you to focus your attraction on men, in order to be accepted, but you are not attracted to men. Why do you think you did that?”
Anne: “Autoandrophobia. It’s the disgust at the idea of being an "oppressive man", powerful idealization of women, and a disgust for hetero relationship dynamics.”
Ritchie: “Can you recall when you first felt that way?”
Anne: “When I was about 19.”
Ritchie: “Can you tell us more about your relationship with your mother and your father? And subsequently, how do you think these relationships have impacted you?”
Anne: “My father passed when I was about 8, he never found out about my transgenderism, and I was mostly raised by my mother. Its possible that having more female influence than male influence caused a quicker progression of my AGP.”
Ritchie: “A quicker progression? Do you think it was going to happen regardless?”
Anne: “In my case yes. however, some AGPs would simply remain cross dressers forever and never transition without the influence of the internet.”
Ritchie: “What are your experiences with therapists?”
Anne: “I only actually attended one, who was no-questions-asked affirming of trans identity. not much came of it.”
Ritchie: “You mentioned that there some of the therapists proposed to you were conversion therapy types. How did you come to that conclusion?”
Anne: “My mom said she'd seen them online. she never took me to one.”
Ritchie: “How did you know they were conversion therapists? Or is that a presumption?
Anne: “She said so. She told me she'd seen conversion therapy online but didn't take me because she doesn't believe in religious conversion.
Ritchie: “That sounds rather distressing, I wonder what was she thinking?”
Anne: “She couldn't find anyone who would be nuanced, who would question why I felt the way I do instead of affirming or address it from a scientific perspective.”
Ritchie: “Without going into to much detail about your younger sibling, you mentioned that they are also displaying traits of autogynephilia, not just in childhood but as an older teenager. Do you think thats linked to your biology or upbringing? Perhaps both?”
Anne: “Upbringing may influence a degree of behavior, but my hunch is that it is primarily genetic. Most prominent examples of two brothers who both have AGP being the Wachowskis (creators of the Matrix).”
Ritchie: “In the discord group, you’ve mentioned that you have a distinct hatred for your genitals. Despite having surgery, this isn’t something I felt myself growing up, and probably a key reason why surgery was not right for me. But you seem dead set, what are your thoughts on surgery, specifically for yourself?”
Anne: “I see no other path towards happiness for me. if there's no better option. And I would probably end up going for a zero depth vulvoplasty.”
Ritchie: “I can see thats became a preference for both transitioners and surgeons, as the complications are far lower, but giving my stance, I do find it difficult when someones considering it. Part of me just wants to talk you out of it, but I think thats more about me than you. So, without going into too much personal detail, do you avoid using your genitals even now?”
Anne: “Yes, I avoid using my genitals at all costs, and I don't want any partner to touch me down there.”
Ritchie: “Can you remember when that started?”
Anne: “Very early in life. I've never had a sexual relationship where I’ve used my genitals, and I've had genital dysphoria for a long time since the start of puberty.”
Ritchie: “You said in your substack, that you use the men’s restroom. For context you live in a northern state in the US. Can I ask, how has this been received by strangers and others? And also, why do you use the men’s, rather than the womens? ”
Anne: “I've never been mistreat, but I have had weird looks. Once a guy muttered ‘is that a girl?’ I use the men's because I feel I do not pass well enough to use the women's without anyone knowing i'm trans, and I feel it would cause disruption and discomfort if i did.”
Ritchie: “For yourself or others?”
Anne: “Well, disrupting others is disrupting to myself, and I don't want to cause a social ruckus for both myself and anyone else. It distresses me, so I'd say both.
Ritchie: “Final question. What are your hopes for the future of this discourse?”
Anne: “I hope that a more scientific and less ideological perspective will be taken in the future. thank you for asking me these questions.”
Ritchie: “Anne, thank you very much for your time and honesty.”
To read more of Anne’s work and thoughts, check out their substack https://substack.com/@anneonymousa
Reflections
Anne is refreshingly honest, and isn’t just some random anime avatar, but someone who has worked to refine their understanding of themselves.
It also goes to show that, regardless of any warnings against such measures, and listening to the accounts of people like myself, that will not change the underlying feelings experienced by Anne.
I don’t think Anne’s feelings are fake at all, and that they detest their genitals. I think it maybe helpful for those looking in, to know that these feelings are somewhat hardwired, and arguing with them or forcefully discouraging someone, does not work. If anything, it can widen an already wide rift and doesn’t progress the conversation.
Instead, I think acknowledgement is the key to moving forward, especially if your supporting someone like Anne. You may not agree, but just recognising it can make the world of difference in a world of polarised discourse.
That’s not to say that we should nod our heads and give anyone a thumbs up who goes for surgery, but I especially, must accept, for some like Anne, it may help them, and I don’t want to get in the way of that, yet I still can’t help having a natural aversion to genital surgery.
I hope if they do go through with it, it does give them peace, and are able to move on with their life with minimal discomfort.
Up Next
I’ll be having a chat with a wonderful lady, Jennifer, a trans widow, who some of you may be familiar with and a young sexologist, G.
Catch up on the full series:
The Autogyne Files Part I - Dirty Words: Exploring the narratives around Autogynephilia
The Autogyne Files Part II - A conversation with Anne Ominous, a young transitioner
The Autogyne Files Part III - A conversation with Jennifer, a Trans Widow
The Autogyne Files Part IV - A conversation with a young Sexologist, G
If you’d like to support my ongoing work and activism, please consider donating, liking, sharing, or leaving a comment below.
Your ongoing support, feedback, and well wishes keep me going! Thank you!
-Ritchie
I am more than twice the age of Anne. Yet, I fully understand this "autoandrophobia." They may deny it for the benefit of the Motte and Bailey strategy. But the anti-male messages of feminists still hurt me in my soul, even though I recognized the falsity of them. And in my young adulthood found alternate methods of thinking about masculinity from writers like Robert Bly.
Teaching young boys to hate themselves on account of their gender is a long-term, insidious evil. Here we see its results on another victim, who had never been taught how to love himself as a man, and the path to becoming a good man who does not need to apologize for how he was born.
life ain't easy. i empathize with this person. i think anyone would. first he had issues that caused him to suffer in a way thats not really describable but that many are familier with. and then he was misled about evidence that affirming opposite gender would help. we now know that for the past 20+ years big biz and established activist groups have been making false statements regarding the efficacy of gac. every stat and statement that claims gac helps is a lie. what this guy needed was likely psych care and or psych meds. but where does that lead this person now? its difficult to say. this is colored by so many conflicting emotions and inner reflections. these many inner reflections are also part of the curse of gac. when psych issues are allowed to continue without gac, they usually discontinue over time. and thats where i would want to go, if i were him. i realize im likely not using the polite pronouns, but i feel using ID pronouns harms people using them. and i dont want to harm anyone. so how do you get to a place where thinking about your suffering isnt a constant activity. i certinly would at least concider stop taking gender meds. i know thats not easy. but long term the meds cause misery. the goal is to stop going to the dr. and to stop thinking about suffering. 90 out of 100 people if they looked at their life know it would be a curse to be constantly reminded of their most tragic time in their life