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IceSkater40's avatar

Lots to think about here, thanks. One comment stands out to me - that they believe less gatekeeping will lead to less detrans. I suspect that may be backwards. When more individuals are transitioned without any real process in place to help them deal with the circumstances that led to the self-ID of trans in the first place, then it's inevitable that the rates of regret will only increase. Especially given how people's beliefs fluctuate over time and that teens and children are in a time of rapid change. I am also surprised to see that political beliefs play such a strong role in changing an individual's personal assessment of their gender identity.

It's simplistic, but I can't help but wonder if the words gender identity should be removed from language and not something anyone should be encouraged to consider. I'm older - but I still recall puberty as a difficult period with lots of adjustments. Giving teens an "out" to believe they can pause puberty or stop it or change it seems like a double edged sword that healthcare professionals should have taken the time to understand better before wielding against innocent victims.

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Ute Heggen's avatar

Again, excellent work here, Ritchie. In case you use the word damning again, here's the spelling. I think you should use this word often! I refer back to the damning sworn affidavit that the PhD psychologist submitted to my 1990s divorce, in which she said she diagnosed my then-husband in the first meeting with him. She went on to say that my unwillingness to stay in the marriage was the reason he "decided to live full-time as a woman." This puts the actual diagnosis in my sphere, implying that if I'd made some kind of scheduling agreement about his cross-dressing, he would have stayed in "Daddy mode" longer. This clinician is still in practice. More in my memoir, In the Curated Woods, True Tales from a Grass Widow (iuniverse, 2022)

The fact that you are doing the work of mental health researchers, doctors and academics is abandonment of medical ethics. First, detransitioners need to be treated with dignity. When TRAs and "the transitioned" don't, be sure to make it clear that they are the ones exhibiting the tantrum behavior. They do this because they also don't know if they'll wake up tomorrow with horrific infections and regret, working too hard to pass as the opposite sex.

Like me, a mere trans widow, you feel the need to warn others against taking this path in a sudden, rushed, uninformed manner. This is a great weight and burden--you do not deserve it.

If I'd been your therapist, for the sake of of the discussion, do you think you'd have accepted my opinion that you were not the ideal candidate for surgery, as you'd been expressing doubts and put it off before? I so want to reach back in time and be that person! My sense is that, any young gay fellow might have a passing fantasy of being female at some point, just because we live in a mostly heterosexual world. Your writing is quite important. You are exposing corruption and propaganda. It is likely that the "gender dysphoria" diagnosis is never actually stable, it strays too far from mind/body, introducing scars and hormonal imbalances. Please be strong, take heart. Sift through the nonsense with a clear mind and a suit of armor around your emotions. Ute

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