'I still regret surgery'

My opening speech at the Battle of Ideas, October 2024

Last October, I was invited to speak at the Battle of Ideas in London and I opened with this 5 minute talk that has just recently been released.

A full transcript, and links to support/follow my work can be found below.

Transcript:

“I’m going to pack in as much as I can for the short time, and I promise it won’t be that long. I just want to give some context of what I’m doing.
So, as in the introduction just over two and a half years ago, I began speaking publicly about my experience with transition. And I had a very simple message:

I regret this, I shouldn’t have done this.

I gave a frank, and at times highly critical view of transition and the surgical procedures, which are sold as lifesaving.
But let me tell you, they are not life saving. They are life ruining, life shortening.
This isn’t just my hard earned opinion, it’s a fact.

Surgery increases suicidality, and the physical issues it creates either immediately or over the course of years are devastating.
And lets be clear by what i mean by surgery. I’ll be explicit as the realities are hidden in the language.

My testicles were removed, my penis was flayed.
Muscles and nerves were removed.
The erectile tissue was mostly removed, but they can’t get it all.
My urethra was shortened and reoriented.
And the remains of what were my genitals was sewn inside out, in a cavity created by my surgeon.
He used his fingers to set the wound, which would then be filled with bandaging.
I can still feel the indentions of his two fingers now.
But sure, say bottom surgery if you want, or GRS.

After all is said and done, Doctors won’t touch you. The ones who want to help don’t know how to help or what to do.
They have no idea what’s going on inside, it’s alien to them.
I don’t blame them for not touching me, what a mess this is.

It was a stupid thing to do, and I’ll never forgive myself for that.
But this opinion is unwelcome in a movement that claims to be all inclusive.
It wasn’t allowed in transition, not from the professionals, and not from the conditional love of the community.

In fact, when I told the therapist at the Gender Clinic I regretted surgery, I was told I didn’t regret it.
I was told it was part of my OCD, that I now had an unstable personality disorder.

You must never speak ill of affirmation, it’s sacrosanct to the entire movement.

Going public has been a double edged sword, one it allowed me to make sense of what happened, but also allowed me to help others in my position.
However, aside from a precious few, this wasn’t a welcome perspective.

I was told my sinister motives, that I want to ban and restrict trans people.
That i was a right wing agent of a lobby group or even a foreign government.
I was assured regret rates were far higher for knee surgery, and there is no panic there, so why for this?

Well let me tell you, if you believe the regret rates are below 1%, you have been hoodwinked.

It has a one in 32 chance of complete necrosis.
1 in 6 chance of complete nerve damage, i.e. no sensation.
A high chance of incontinence, bleeding, pain, and of course; the despair.

I was told that as I was less than 1%, that our small numbers didn’t matter in the grand scheme of gender care.
We’re collateral damage, nothing more.

So we turn to alcohol, drugs and many others self destruct.
To quote one of my critics; ‘Detransitioners are a self-correcting problem.’
Fuck you by the way.

I will not be robbed of one of the things I have left, my opinion.
It’s mine, and you cannot have it.

I still regret surgery, none of what i said will ever change that fact, as uncomfortable as that may be for some others.
And there is a growing number of people who feel the same.
And those people are facing difficult choices;
Be honest and lose your friends, and maybe even your livelihood…
Or stay silent, and bury your principles along with your regret.

Take responsibility.

Which I think means; confess my stupidity, and take all the blame in silence.
But whatever you do:
Do not blame the surgeon who held the scalpel.
Do not blame the psychatristists who signed the assessment.
And do not blame the crowd that cheered you along.
And never ever speak about it.

To that I say, once more.

Get fucked.

And thank you

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Support Ritchie

If you liked this speech, and other works of mine, please consider liking, sharing or leaving a comment below. You can also donate via PayPal, which is more than welcome, though I would ask only do so if you have the means.

Up coming: TikTok

I’m trialling a short period of TikTok to reach a wider audience. I’ll be using this opportunity to engage in healthy, balanced and fair discussions on how to best treat those who have undergone similar treatments, regardless of how they label themselves.

Thank you xoxo